Haven’t seen Shia this irate since Beans farted on the beach of the stranded island in the Even Stevens movie. Apparently Saturday was a big one for LaBeouf. According to the Daily Mail, early Saturday morning Shia LaBeouf was arrested in the heart of Savannah, Georgia for over aggressively asking a cop for a cigarette. What a world we live in. Shia was clearly 500% done with this cop as soon as the clinks reached his wrists. I’m almost positive half of the one liners he said in this video were from Jay Z early 2000 tracks. “Im a fuckin’ American, I pay my taxes”, “I got more millionaire lawyers than you know what to do with, you stupid bitch”. There’s no doubt in my mind those were off the Black Album. What tops it all off is that he legitimately plays the white card, “Why would I ask for a cigarette if I was racist, you stupid bitch.” BOLD. FUCKING. MOVE. COTTON. And I’m not gonna lie, Shia brings up an excellent point. Never once in my life have I ever met a man who asks cops for cigarettes while also simultaneously being racist. It’s in the boge 10 commandments that racism will not be tolerated by the cigarette smoking community who pay their taxes and are American.
This all being said, if history proofs anything, it’s that drinking with Shia LaBeouf will make for the time of your life. Whether its getting arrested for slapping Alan Cumming on the ass during a cabaret or getting arrested in Georgia for asking a cop for a Newport, life will guaranteed never be the same after a night on the town with Louis Stevens.
“Boooooges, you stupid bitch”